Denial
by Infinite Snow
Summary: "Don't deny it. You want me as much as I want you." - [Tora/Misaki] - M for swearing


Tora knew he wanted her. He wanted her bad. But he was far from a romantic person. He was no Romeo. He wouldn't woo her with a thousand cheesy lines, climb up a balcony or any of those foolish acts. He wouldn't woo her with chocolates and roses and petty gifts to win her heart.

Because he wasn't like the other guys and she wasn't like the other girls.

And his love wasn't some kind of fated mate-based love. He didn't know he would fall in love, otherwise he wouldn't have been engaged to his fiancé. But he wants nothing between him and her. And his fiancé was one of those obstacles. So ending the engagement would be one solution to clearing the path to what rightfully belongs to him.

But Misaki is not completely 'available'. She has a boyfriend. Or so she thinks. Usui is practically always all over her, like a lovelorn puppy. He isn't fit for her, no matter how she thinks otherwise.

She isn't a damsel in distress, and she is no slut. She is a fierce, feisty, and strong woman. Her words as lethal as her moves, she is the president of Seika for no ordinary reason.

And he wants her. He wants her because she is not like the other women he met before. But she doesn't reciprocate those feelings, or so she says. He knows she wants him. It is hard to say otherwise.

Misaki was walking home from work on a dark night, when he thought, it was a perfect opportunity. Perfect opportunity to convince her to just run away, run away from reality.

He ordered the driver to trail her silently and stop when she stops. When she acknowledges his limo, to stop so he could get out.

After five minutes of trailing behind her, or in a normal person's perspective – stalking – her, Misaki finally turned around, her suspicions correct.

"What do you want?" Misaki glared.

Tora knew something was wrong with Misaki. Something was off in her aura. Normally she would be furious with him, her demon horns prick on the side of her head as her eyes glow with hatred. But that hatred would be just superficial, like how she couldn't hate him even though he did all of the things he did to her to convince her to go to his school.

But her face had a hard, deep, profound expression. Somewhat like a resignation, but mixed with hurt, anger, jealousy, rage, irritation, but most of all: sadness.

"I just wanted to see you," Tora said, shrugging as he got out of the limo, "But what's up with you? Walking home alone on a beautiful night?"

"I have no time for your poetic shit," Misaki spat, "What the fucking hell do you want from me?"

"Now, now, easy there, tigress," Tora chuckled upon hearing Misaki's low growl, "I just wanted to see you."

"Are you sure that's it?" Misaki raised an eyebrow.

"Cross my heart and hope to die," Tora mockingly drew an 'x' above his heart with his right index finger.

"No you don't. Your words are fake, like they're mocking me," Misaki sighed and ran a hand through her hair.

"Good girl! Chocolate?" Tora mockingly praised Misaki, holding out nothing in his hands.

"I am not a lab rat to be conditioned," Misaki snapped, "Do you want something or else I am going to go."

"I just want to see you," Tora repeated.

"And you are wasting my time, same as ever," Misaki rolled her eyes, slinging her schoolbag over her shoulder and continuing on her way home.

"I just wanted to ask if you wanted to come with me," Tora said, dropping his mockery.

Misaki turned around and scanned his face, for any lie, deceit or foolishness. To her surprise, he came clean. He was serious. But to where?

"Where do you want to take me?" Misaki asked, skeptically.

"Somewhere to talk. You know, the moment you turned around, you looked like a million things got slapped across your face," Tora said, "You can't deny it, no matter how hard you try to hide it. But unless a good schoolgirl like you has homework to do when she goes home, then…"

"I finished my work ahead of time, thank you very much," Misaki snapped, proud of the fact that she found a way to complete her homework before the school is over, a feat not possible for a normal human being.

"Yeah, yeah, goody-two-shoes, you coming or not?" Tora gestured.

"I am probably walking to my own death trap but what the hell?" Misaki shrugged, walking care-free into the limo, slamming her schoolbag on the ground of the vehicle.

Tora was shocked. He thought she would resist, make some snappy comeback and turn on her heels, intent on getting home in one piece. But he never imagined her to be like this… but this was Misaki and he didn't expect nothing less from her than a road of surprises.

"You changed," Tora stated simply the moment he climbed into the limo after her, shutting the door.

The chauffeur started driving to a place he knew Tora would want to go, any random quiet place that was far from the city.

"No shit Sherlock," Misaki shrugged, watching the city fade from her window.

"Care to tell me anything?" Tora asked.

"Thought you wanted to talk about it at your special little place," Misaki mocked him.

"Right," Tora rolled his eyes, looking forward again.

-x-

They reached the destination: some random grassy field with big trees dotting the sides of it. Misaki chose one big oak tree to rest under, and Tora simply followed.

"So?"

"He wasn't who I thought he was."

"What?" Tora asked.

"Usui. He… he was seeing another behind my back, and I don't know why, but it fucking hurts to find out that he had been seeing someone else consistently," Misaki stopped abruptly, her throat tightening and her vision swimming with tears, "Am I not good enough? Not pretty, smart, funny, or rich enough? I can admit I have flaws but he didn't have to say the things he did to that girl about me."

"What did he say?" Tora asked.

"I was some poor homeless hobo who is always constantly on her period, PMS-ing, bitching and just bossing people around and how sick he is of it," Misaki buried her face in her palms, "I am like this to guys because my dad left me and my mom and sister. I began to hate guys because of what he did to my family, plundering us in a debt we couldn't pay ourselves out of. I learned aikido because of it. I became this cruel, horrible demon everybody talks about in school. Nobody knows my story, and now after today, I learned even he doesn't know me as well as I imagined he did."

And even Tora had to admit, he didn't know why she had always been such a demon towards him. He didn't know this part of her life. And all of his annoyance, grudge and hatred had melted away, replaced with raw guilt.

 _You called her a thousand names, and you never knew what she was going through._

He hated to admit, but his nagging conscience was always right. Even when he had a high ego, that little voice, (which was smothered by his pride) always nagged about the sins of his actions.

"So what happened?" Tora asked finally, after a few minutes of pregnant pause.

"I found him and broke up with him. Asked him how long he had been seeing her. And while he didn't tell me how long he saw her, he did admit he was seeing her and he didn't regret it. He told me he liked submissive girls better," Misaki whispered.

"I think he is blind," Tora said abruptly.

Misaki looked up in surprise.

"I have seen so many women in my life and all of them were shallow, submissive, greedy and just so materialistic. It even sickened me that they would sell their own souls for money. How could someone not like a girl like you? You… you're different. You are refreshing, and if he can't see that, I don't think he deserves you," Tora said, his own eyes widening at his kind words.

"Th-Thank you…" Misaki mumbled in shock, too.

"Are you feeling better?" Tora asked.

"Not really…" Misaki sighed, "But a hell lot better than being in a relationship with him."

"He's a fucking bastard, Misaki, he doesn't deserve someone as devoted as you," Tora said, nudging her.

Misaki couldn't keep the grin from forming on her face when she heard these words. Quite unexpected coming from the president of her rival school, but they sounded sincere. She would take whatever comfort she could get.

At that moment when she grinned, Tora whipped out his phone and snapped a picture. When her eyes adjusted, broken out of her happy trance, she realized what he did.

"I probably look horrible!" Misaki wailed, clutching for the phone that Tora held out of reach, "Please delete it."

"Now, now, I thought we had this empowering speech about love and the next moment you are obsessing over how you look in a picture? Did we really waste this much time over nothing?" Tora chided Misaki.

"I look horrible from crying," Misaki huffed, crossing her arms like a little kid.

"I think you look beautiful, even with watery eyes and a red nose," Tora said, showing her the picture he took.

Misaki had to admit she looked something akin to a sick person who just woke up. But she didn't look as hideous as she claimed to be. Maybe she was being too harsh on herself.

"You are being too harsh on yourself," Tora said, as if reading her thoughts, "I think you are always critiquing yourself beyond necessary."

"I can't help it," Misaki sighed, lying down onto the soft grass, "It is a common struggle for girls. Wanting to be what society wants us to be."

"But you're not, and how do you cope with being different?" Tora asked, following suit, reveling the feel of the silky grass touching the tips of his ears.

"I just don't I guess," Misaki shrugged, "I am different, they know I am different, and so I accept it that I am different and nothing I do or say will change it."

"Do you really want to change, and be accepted?" Tora asked.

"I don't know, that changes a lot. Sometimes I do, to truly be accepted and be a part of something, but sometimes I don't want to be just another face in a crowd. I want to be who I want to be and not be held down by chains. I'm not a doll. I am a person," Misaki admitted.

"You can always escape you know," Tora said, "We could just run away, you and me, ditch this life and all the pressure that comes with it. Leave and never come back."

"I don't know," Misaki shrugged, "I have a dream in life too, and I want to achieve it."

"What do you want to be?" Tora asked.

"A lawyer," Misaki sighed.

"You know, if you can learn English quickly, you can apply to Harvard in USA. They have one of the best law schools, if you ask me," Tora said.

"I am trying to learn English," Misaki said, "But money is the problem. Even with my grades, scholarships are getting harder to earn."

"I could pay for it," Tora said, "If you want to."

"That is what you said about Miyabigaoka High. Are you sane now?" Misaki asked sarcastically.

"To this day, I don't know," Tora said quietly.

"I heard that," Misaki lightly retorted.

"I bet you did," Tora mused.

"C'mon, I know you are hiding something too. What is it?" Misaki asked.

"What? No, I'm fine, just peachy," Tora said.

"Oh really, so you expect me to tell you what's wrong, but you won't do the same?" Misaki raised an eyebrow, "How fair."

"You basically spilled your guts out to me," Tora rolled his eyes.

"Your ego is coming back," Misaki got up only to topple Tora, lying perpendicular to him, using his abdomen as a pillow to support her chest.

"Love," Tora blurted out.

"What?" Misaki asked, "You are so trite with your words."

"Let's spell it out, okay? L-O-V-E. Four letters, two vowels, two consonants, one syllable- oof!" Tora wheezed as Misaki punched his stomach, knocking out the air from his chest.

"I know, stupid. But what about it? Don't go all Shakespearian on me, cut to the chase," Misaki rolled her eyes, adjusting her position.

"You know, the difficulties of life, and loving someone who just hates your guts," Tora admitted.

"Yeah, I wouldn't blame this girl you love. You see, when you eye-rape women, it is not flattery, it spells rapist, as the word eye-rape suggests," Misaki rolled her eyes.

"Well I guess she would say the same thing too," Tora said, shrugging.

"Then she is smart," Misaki retorted.

"Oh she is, but completely oblivious to my affections," Tora said.

"You had feelings?!" Misaki asked, surprised.

"Oh shut up," Tora grunted, "You're such a drama queen."

"Says the originator or drama himself," Misaki snorted.

"Lamest comeback ever," Tora whined.

"And you're telling me," Misaki scoffed.

"What are we even talking about?" Tora wondered.

"About this oblivious girl who can't see imaginary things," Misaki shrugged.

"Well, they're obviously there, she can't see it!" Tora snapped.

"And why would that be so?" Misaki asked, tired of his elusiveness.

"BECAUSE THAT GIRL IS YOU!" Tora exclaimed, shoving Misaki off of him and sat up, glaring at the raven-haired beauty.

"What?" Misaki whispered, sitting up as well.

"It's true! I have had feelings for you for such a long time but every single time I see you whether we talk or I watch you from afar, you are always 'Usui this, and Usui that!' despite the fact he was probably texting some slut or scrolling on Tinder or watching porn because you have dignity and want to wait until marriage!" Tora yelled.

"And you don't rape women?" Misaki snapped.

Tora blushed furiously. He had to admit she was right. He was a huge womanizer before she met him and he did have one night stands WITH PROTECTION. But she changed him. And he didn't care about the physical part of love. All that mattered to him was Misaki's feelings and emotions and that girl made him qualify to be locked up in a mental asylum. She made him go insane.

"You changed me, and if I were in his shoes, I would spend every single moment looking at you, cherishing every part about you, your flaws and strengths, and enjoying every moment I spend with you. I would daydream about you when we aren't holding hands and I would doodle your face in my notebook when I am not with you and I would secretly say your name with my last name, just reveling how beautifully my last name pairs with your first name and how smoothly it rolls off my tongue. Igarashi Misaki," Tora said.

"You… you did all that?" Misaki stuttered.

"Got a notebook with scribbles and scrabbles of you. Hope you feel better, you turned me into a sappy romantic," Tora said, "But unlike a romantic person, I don't want to be just content with loving you from afar. I want to have your heart just like you own mine."

Misaki didn't open her mouth, too shocked to respond.

But Tora didn't care. He wasn't going to wait for her answer. Or like he imagined somewhere in the depth of his nightmare – her rejection.

"Don't deny it. You want me as much as I want you," Tora gruffly said, before tilting Misaki's chin with his index finger and capturing her lips with his.

 _-fin-_


End file.
